Posts Tagged ‘fear as a tool’

Fear–let it help you not hurt you!

Fear isn’t necessarily a bad thing, if you use it wisely it might even help you!

I am a runner. I loved running 5 km races. Occasionally I would run a 10 km race, but they seemed really long. Somewhere along the way I decided I should try a half marathon. The furthest I had run at that point was a 16 km run which was part of my training plan to run 10 km faster. I figured I could likely manage 5 more km.

I asked my sister (a running coach and talented runner) for a training plan. I followed it and picked my goal race. I set myself a goal of completing the race in 1 hour and 50 minutes. Race day arrived and I felt great. I ran my first 10 km at a pace that would have had me finishing at nearly 1:45! I was ahead of pace! Somewhere around 17 km I hit the wall. Most people hit the wall when they run their first marathon, I guess I am an overachiever because I did it on a half. My knee and hips were screaming, I was completely miserable. A combination of walking and jogging took me to the finish line, and I felt every single step. That night, I was so sore I remember contemplating stealing a walker from a lady walking across the parking lot (if I could catch her) and wondering why street curbs were so high!

Fast forward two years, I registered for my first marathon. The marathon is infamous for testing the limits of runners. At this point I had successfully completed four half marathons but the marathon was more than a little intimidating. Could I do it? Preparing for a marathon reminded me of pregnancy: Anyone who had been through it themselves either had advice or a horror story to share! 42 km! 4 + hours non-stop running, I had bombed my first attempt at 21 km, how would I finish 42 km!

I had a training plan, a running group and coach, and amazing family and friends cheering me on. They gave me the tools and support, but it was fear that gave me the motivation to prepare. I followed my training plan, when the running conditions were bad, I drove to the gym and paid to use a treadmill. I was terrified of repeating my experience with my first half marathon. I listened and considered all the advice fellow runners shared. On race day, I started out feeling good. I got to 21 km feeling pretty good. But, when you train for a marathon your longest run is 32 km, so I knew the last 10 km was the real test. The best description I ever heard for a marathon was a 32 km warm up for a 10 km race. I got to 32 km and felt okay. I reached 35 km where my husband and son were waiting with signs to cheer me on and I was tired of course, but I was able to maintain my pace. At 40 km I realized I was going to make it. My first marathon was a race I could be proud of!

NationalCapitalMarathonIt was fear of failing that motivated me to do my training runs. It was fear that had me dragging myself out in the dark, through the cold, through the snow and sleet. It was that fear that led to my success

I’ve had the same experience when preparing for big presentations. Fear of failing drives me to prepare, to research, to practice my presentation, my demos. Fear is what motivates me to do the groundwork I need to do to succeed!

I am not the most disciplined worker. I’m the person who forgets to get something done. I am the person who says ‘I am going to do sit-ups every day’ does it for three days and then gets distracted. One of the reasons I decided to register for a marathon was because I wanted to prove to myself that I was capable of doing something that required discipline. You can’t fake your way through a marathon. If you skip the runs, you will feel it on race day. The fear of falling apart after 32 km helped me do what I needed to do and allowed me to achieve my goal.

So what is it you want to achieve? are you afraid you can’t do it? Maybe that very fear is what will help YOU reach YOUR goal!